So it's Mother's Day! And there is no mum in this family dynamic. Recently when out shopping a sales assistant wished us both a Happy Mother's Day... and it got me thinking.
Should we celebrate Mother's Day? Do I worry about this day? Do I want to hide away from it? Hell no! I have a wonderful mum and mum in law. I couldn't be luckier! Of course I love Mother's Day and celebrating them and all that they have done! This day is for them. But since becoming a dad I also use this day as an opportunity to celebrate the amazing women in my son's life. The aunties, the friends, the Mother figures. Because he is so blessed to be surrounded by strong, positive women everywhere he looks.
But I'm not a mum. And I'm okay with that. This day isn't for me. It's for the MUMS! I have Father's Day! The lovely lady in the shop wished us a Happy Mother's Day. I of course smiled, said "Thank you!" and in the moment found it nice of her. And it is nice because in her head it was a lovely thing to say which I genuinely appreciated. But thinking about it a little more, I don't need Mother's Day. (In the same breath I want to say I would never be offended if someone wanted to include us in Mother's Day, after all if you look up 'mothering' in the dictionary, it means 'to raise a child with care and affection'. And I am pretty sure we're doing that).
I've heard people say a few times in the past about a child needing it's mum. When they are poorly or talking about the special cuddles only a mum can give. This does annoy me a bit if I am being honest... my son gets all the cuddles, looking after, sensitivity and love he needs from me; his dad.
Then there's the other side of the argument. Some dads may well celebrate this day because they are performing the parent role regardless of their gender. And I'm all for that too! My motto in life is to just do you. Do what makes YOU happy. If it's for you, then embrace it and enjoy!
I, for one, look forward to the Father's Days of the future when my son is a little older and is able to make a coffee himself and bring it up to me in bed at a decent time (not 5am please!). That'll be the best Father's Day gift I could ever ask for. Okay, maybe that and a spa day for us both with no child in sight? Is that allowed? But for now, I need to prep tomorrow's lunches and tidy up the aftermath of having the nannys round today... if you want me i'll be in the kitchen.